God's Waiting Room

"Then Joshua blessed Caleb son of Jephunneh and gave him Hebron as his inheritance."  Joshua 14: 13

Many of us have heard the story of Caleb.  He  and some other Israelite men were sent by Moses to spy on the people of Canaan.  While his fellow spies came back and filled the people's hearts with fear, Caleb encouraged the people.  He knew God had promised them this land and that no matter how huge, strong, or powerful the inhabitants were they WERE going to win.  The damage was done however, and the fear in the hearts of the nation of Israel cost them forty more years in the wilderness.  Caleb did no walk away empty handed however.  He was promised a land blessing due to his faithfulness.

What many of us who have heard the story several time over the years miss, what we really know but we do not really consider the implications of, is that Caleb had to wait 45 years for his blessing!!!!!!!  Scripture tells us that Caleb's blessing was because he followed the Lord wholeheartedly, but he was not rewarded immediately.  He was not allowed to enjoy the promised land while only those who did not follow the Lord wholeheartedly were forced to wander the dessert.  Caleb had to wander with them. 

When he was 45 he came to Joshua and asked for what he was promised and received it.  Scripture gives no indication that his faith or even his body had weakened during this time.  He did not give up or quit because he wasn't getting what he was promised fast enough.  He did not neglect to ask because he had given up.  He kept the faith and when he did get to enjoy his reward, it was all that much sweeter. 

I am blessed to be in a place today where I am enjoying sweet, peaceful, ordinary life in a way I never have.  The past several years of our life, though wonderful and full of blessing, have been chaotic and uproarious as well.  Stress of working outside of the home, a baby born with a chronic illness, many moves, and financial struggles have been our wilderness and is has ended in what I hope and pray is where we will get to stay.  Though I know there will be more hard times through the years, this current time is blissful.   We are not rich, but we are making it and digging out of debt, I am working from home, and we get to live in the most beautiful place I have ever seen.  Our daughter is healthy and has a great team of doctors, and our son and daughter both have many opportunities they would not have had anywhere we have lived previously.  Though during those years when it wasn't so easy I cannot say I was always a saint, I never doubted that God had something better and bigger for our family in His time.

I wonder if when Caleb got his land he spend his nights worrying what was going to burst his bubble.  Would fire or famine take it all away?  I hope not.  I hope he enjoyed every minute of God's good gift.  Knowing what I know from scripture about Caleb, I imagine I need not worry about that.  At times I find myself worrying that this will all disappear, but I am trying and going to keep trying to remember that God gives us good gifts to enjoy, and more than that to use for His glory.  I want to do both. 

So if today finds you in a time of wondering in your own wilderness, I want to encourage you to do as Caleb did and continue to follow God wholeheartedly during this time.  You will be much better prepared to recognze and enjoy the blessing when it comes.  If you are enjoying good gifts today, really ENJOY them, and find how you can use them to glorify our mighty God.

God bless,

Goderruptions

Yes, I know that "Goderupption" is not a word, and while it may sound like an erruption of God, which could be awesome or terrifying (probably both) it is meant to be a combination of God and interruptions.  Of course the idea that God has to intterupt somewhere means that you are not exactly where you supposed to be or doing what you are supposed to be doing, right?  I had a day full of God changing plans, my plans, to what He had planned just yesterday.

We have family visiting.  The fall foliage here is beautiful right now and way better than where they are from, so we went in together and split the cost of a minivan rental.  Everything was all paid for and taken care of electronically, and I even patted myself of the back for saving over a hundred dollars through choose my own price bidding. 

One teeny tiny problem.  The bidding site neglected to tell us that even though we had already paid for the van, we had to have a CREDIT card, not a DEBIT card, to actually take the van away.  "We have rented cars before without credit cards!" is what I am sure I screamed at my poor, defenseless hubby when he broke the news over the phone.  He explained that each time before we had a return plane ticket.  Oh. We have credit cards, we just do not use them and certainly do not carry them.  I did not wanted to forced to use it!  I was so upset.  We had reservations for dinner on top of a MOUNTAIN!  It was going to be FUN with my parents, grandmother, and aunt.  Everyone would be disappointed.  I had let everyone down.  Why can things never go right?

Then God touched my heart.  Enjoy the day with your family, he said.  Have fun, take the girls to a thrift store with some of those coupons you got.  Just enjoy the day.  So I said, "Okay God, thank you."  When it got home, everyone except my mother was actually GLAD to be staying home.  My grandmother was tired, my aunt was excited not to be drugged up on dramamine for the day, and my dad was grateful for the rest after driving 600 miles the day before.  Wow.  Mom was okay too, just not as EXCITED as everyone else.  Hmf... oh well, thank you Lord, you know best.

It gets better.  Decided to have a date night with the hubby since we had sitters.  I tried to use promo codes to get movie tickets.  I completely WASTED money when they didn't work and booked two different show times at two different theaters.  We coud have gone and seen a show seperately at seperate times, but we did not.  That is NOT a date!  I was mad and grumpy that we were not going to get to go.  I told my husband "I am taking the women to the thrift store, we cannot go to a movie, decide before I get back if you even want to go out to just eat."  I am sure he was SOOOOOO excited for an evening together after that.

I passed the thrift store but found it quickly when we turned around.  When the light turned is when I realized and I was in a left turn only lane and had to turn on to the INTERSTATE!  Not that I am scared or anything, but it was forever before there was an exit to turn around.  When I finally could get off I was turning around in a parking and wonder of wonders is was the parking lot of another branch of the same store we were trying to find.  We just stopped and went in, one is just as good as the other, right? 

Oh no, God gives his children good gifts:)  We found some great deals, most that we probably could have gotten at the other store too, but we will never know.  But I found the mother load.  A pair of 7 For All Mankind Jeans, perfect fit, for $8.99.  Now, I do not know much about jean brands, I buy them cheap wherever I can get them, but from a friend I knew these sold for between $150 and $200 on most occassions.  I'm thinking HELLO EBAY!  However, now that I think about it, I may keep them as a reminder... I just need pray to see what He wants:) 

I had also been lamenting about the wig that goes with commercial Strawberry Shortcake costume this year.  My two year old desperately wants the costume, which is moderately priced, but the wig comes separate and is almost the same price!  My mother found a red toddler wig at this store for $2.99!  Yes, thank you Lord for good gifts.

Date night without the movie?  Fantabulous!  I really think God meant for us to have a night to reconnect, and you cannot do that at a movie or rushing to get to a movie.  He had a wonderful dinner, went to get ice cream and sat in the car listening to music as we ate, and then we killed some time in the Christian bookstore and my husband found a great book that I know God had planned for him to find.  I got a pretty neat deal too...

Point being, God knows, and he has better things planned, even in the small everyday details of life.  Try not to waste this miracle being grumpy like I did for a long time yesterday, but enjoy it fully.

Did You Catch the Encouragement for Today?

Proverbs 31 Ministries had an exceptional daily devotion a few days ago that I am just getting to read.  Well, it especially touched me today anyway.  Not that they all don't, but this one especially did.   Let me warn you...the gist is about dented cans and how the food inside can still be sweet and we are all damaged goods... this goes against EVERYTHING I know about eating food out of dented cans....but that's not the point:) 

Just When I Thought I Had It All Figured Out

I give up!  Lol!  Had a new job, increased hours, fine because my dear daughter loves preschool, then decreased hours so can't pay for preschool and gas, now dear daughter still in preschool and I am hoping I can make enough working at home to keep her there because she loves it so much. 

I have been trying to figure out what the point of the job was anyway.  Did I make a mistake in accepting it or even pursuing it?  I don't think so.  Here is what I have come up with, with some guidance from the Father.  I would never had put her in preschool for more time each day if it were not for that job, and being back in the workforce outside of the home for a short time has reminded me of somethings that will make me more successful working from home.  So here we go again.....do I have it right this time?  Who knows!?  We shall see... in the mean time I better get to work.  Have a great weekend!

The Tables Have Turned

It is a very, very strange feeling.  I have spend my entire mothering career, over six years, striving, worrying, and aching to find away to stay home with my children.  As I said in previous posts, we decided dear daughter should go to preschool at least part-time, but I always knew if income did not support it I could bring her home with me and continue as we were with me working from home.

 Well, the tables have turned.  She loves preschool SO much that I am now looking for a way to keep her in.  My boss at my new job cut my hours.  We apparently miscalculated the amount of work or the time it would take to do the work.  Either way, it means less money.  So, instead of my original plan of if it does not work out we are no worse off than we were before, it is now a mad dash to figure out a way to KEEP her in "daycare." 

I honestly think she would be heartbroken if I took her out.  This is a strange, strange feeling, but she is learning a lot and truly cannot wait to get back each day.  I have to wonder if this is the Lord's way of prompting me to go back to work full-time, but only prayer and time will tell.  It has been a crazy couple of months, but we have definitely had crazier and we are so very blessed.  Praise Jesus for our health and family!

When Working Away From Home is Better... Who Would've Thought

So my dreams came true and I got to work from home.  Of course the true dream would be not to have to work at all other than as a wife and mother, but that is not happening here anytime soon.  Working from home has been a true blessing beyond measure and allowed a lot of things to get done that were very, very stressful before.  However, the extra time with the kids still wasn't there.  We still struggled to do Ashton's treatments, Jackson's school work, and housework.  I was up at all hours of the night working, and I was contantly putting the kids off to meet a deadline.

Enter God with a new blessing.  My daughter LOVES pre-school so much that I began a part-time job outside of the home.  It pays for preschool and still leaves at least as much as I was making at home.  I get off at 2:00 so I can pick her up just after her nap, go get my son, and when we get home ALL I have to be is a wife and mother.  I miss them like crazy, but my son is in school anyway and my daughter cannot wait to get back every morning.  When I was picking her up before nap she was asking to sleep there, so really all I did is let her. 

Another schedule change, but everyone seems to be adjusting.  Still tweaking the house cleaning schedule, but it will come.  And I can still write from home on days when the kids are out of school and I have to be here with them.  God is so good... and who would have imagined that working away from home would give me more time to be a wife and mother?  It seems that way anyway... I guess we will see.  Of course the key is that is it PART-TIME.  Thank you Lord for good gifts!

How Much Faith Do We Really Want?

I was struck with a most disheartening, almost terrifying thought this morning while reading the Daily Devotional from Proverbs 31 Ministries.   In this devotional, the author (Lysa Terkeurst) makes the oh so true statement that to be women of faith, we must live lives that require a little faith.  Most of us live our lives daily in our own little comfort zone, very preditictable for the most part.

  These devotions always have a prayer at the bottom.  I read the prayer, began to pray it, and then the fear set in.  What had I just prayed?  Give me more faith?  Think about that...is that not akin to praying for patience?  The only way to make it stronger is to use it, and the only way it gets used it for it to be tested.

  Do we REALLY want that?  We should.  If we do not, why don't we?  We lives lives that require very little faith most of the time. Do we step out on faith, or do we avoid situations we fear will make God look bad?  I contest that this is worse than unworked faith, rather it is a  lack of faith.  We have to position our lives to collide with God's miracles.  Often we do not have the choice as they are positioned that way for us.  I have been there.  Now I am not.  Now I need to find a way to make God's work evident in my life, giving Him all the glory, and thanking Him for the choice at this time. 

Read the devotional.  Consider this.  Any thoughts?  I would love to hear them!

One last thing.  For some reason I cannot comment on my own posts.  My sweet friend Rachel, whom I recently reconnected with left a comment on my post about cleaning schedules and I could not respond!  I am sorry Rachel.  I am working on that.  Her cleaning routine sounds like the one I had before this week.  I'll be posting soon about how the new schedule we are trying works out.  In the mean time, feel free to chime in on that conversation as well:)