Undignified

"I will become even more undignified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes. But by these slave girls you spoke of, I will be held in honor."

2 Samuel 6:22

I am one of those.  You know, the ones that get the weird looks in Church because they are waving their hands, or jumping around, or whatever, during worship?  Really I'm not, but I wish I was.  I am not like that in Church.  I mean, I have been known to raise my hands, or lift my head and close my eyes.  Things that would have created quite a stir in my little 40 member congregation in my home church where I grew up.  Things I never knew were OKAY, let alone desired by God in the right context.  When I did see it at other Churches, boy was it WEIRD!  (Please know I am talking about God prompted worship, not putting on a show for the benefit of others or yourself.)  But that is not the point of today's post.  Public worship is for another time.  I love public worship, but today, I want to talk about private worship, between you and God, and what your family sees of it.

In my alone times with God, I have been know to lay face down on the floor and sing, weep, whatever.  I have been know to dance, raise my hands, sing, or weep, or both!  I have cried out, and I have simply sat and listened.  When it is just me and my Father, I praise Him however He leads me in the moment.  I truly believe this is how it should be.  He speaks to me during these times.  Sometimes I speak back audibly, sometimes in my mind, and sometimes not at all.  Although, since it is impossible to not have a single thought, and He hears all thoughts, I suppose I am always speaking back really.

But say you hear the pitter patter of little feet coming down the hall, or hear the door to the bathroom signaling your spouse is awake.  How do you react?  Typically, in the past, I have jumped up.  I'll grab my Bible and devotional book, pen, and notebook, and assume "the position" in the recliner.  There, I am a dignified lady doing a dignified quiet time.  Now, don't get me wrong.  There is NOTHING wrong with sitting in the recliner for quiet time. I do not spend every minute of every quiet time dancing or rolling on the floor.  There is a time and place for each, which should be determined by God at His prompting,  not man.

Why do I jump up?  I've been thinking about his lately.  I've noticed in my son's bedtime prayers he is using some of the same phrasing he hears me use when we pray on the way to school.  Things like "protect our minds from the evil one" and "protect us from all illness and injury."  My five year old did not come up with that on his own, and he may not even understand what he is praying.  But what struck me is that his early relationship with the Lord is being modeled after my own.  Hmmmm.... so what kind of relationship do I pray for him to have with the Lord?  It took me a LONG time to get to the point where I was comfortable with God led worship.  Where I could get over my pride and lay face down before my God and not feel silly, but connected.  I want my children to come to that place sooner.  I am not sure you can teach it, but a good start might be not jumping up.  Let them see you, let them giggle and ask questions.  Then tell them.  Tell them you were on your face because you were bowing at God's throne.  Tell them you were dancing because you were soooooooo excited about God.  Tell them you were crying because you broke God's heart, and you were telling Him how sorry you were.  Even if they do not understand it, it will begin to build a foundation.  A foundation for their own budding relationship with the Lord, our God and Savior.  Hopefully, when they start to hear His promptings in worship, they will be more quick to obey and act, and not be ashamed! :)